高中生英语小故事讲述

？？楼主没有说清楚呀？是要一个英文的小故事吗？

英语幽默小故事

I Have His Ear in My Pocket

Ivan came home with a bloody nose and his mother asked, "What happened?" "A kid bit me," replied Ivan.

"Would you recognize him if you saw him again?" asked his mother.

"I'd know him any where," said Ivan. "I have his ear in my pocket."

伊凡鼻子流着血回到家里。他妈妈问，“发作了什么事？” “一个男孩咬了我一口，”伊凡说。“再见到他你能认出来吗？”妈妈问。“他走到哪里我都能认出他，”伊凡说。“他的耳朵还在我衣兜里呢？ 他的耳朵在我衣兜里

Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. "What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday?" "I gave it to a poor old woman," he answered."You're a good boy," said the mother proudly. "Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman?"

"She is the one who sells the candy." A Good Boy

小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了？” 好孩子

“我给了一个不幸的老太婆，”他答复说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈自豪地说“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴味呢？“她是个卖糖果的。”

Hospitality

The hostess apologized to her unexpected guest for serving an apple-pie without any cheese. The little boy of the family left the room quietly for a moment and returned with a piece of cheese which he laid on the guest's plate. The visitor smiled, put the cheese into his mouth and then said: "You must have better eyes than your mother, sonny. Where did you find the cheese?" "In the rat-trap, sir," replied theboy.

由于主人在吃苹果馅饼时，家里没有奶酪了，于是女主人向大家表示歉意。这家的小男孩悄然地分开了屋子。过了一会儿，他拿着一片奶酪回到房间，把奶酪放在主人的盘子里。 主人浅笑着把奶酪放进嘴里说：“孩子，你的眼睛就是比你妈妈的好。你在哪里找到的奶酪？” “在捕鼠夹上，先生。”那小男孩说。好客

面试人员给一位前来应征的男士一张履历表，于是就填了这样的信息——

姓名：English or Chinese□英文的还是中文的？

年龄：Confidential（这是公家成绩）

身高：Not related to the job（这跟任务有关系么）

体重：Varies all the time before lunch or after（随时改动饭前饭后都不同

寓居地：At what stage of my life please be more specific（那是一个特别的中央，我生命的舞台）

电话：Ericsson（爱立信手机）

电子邮件：Only give to pretty and rich girls（只留给美丽和富有的女孩）

下班工夫：The shorter the better（越短越好）

应征职位：A position that has not much to do but surround by pretty and young girls（找一个不做什么实事，但能被美女包围的职位）

学历：Graduated at the wild chicken university（毕业于一个你找不着的大学

言语才能：Fluent in bullshits（侃大山是特长）

兴味：Sleeping and sleeping（睡得昏天黑地）

生日：正月初七

阅历：Fooling around all the time（游戏人生）

曾任职位：Decent or not decent□please be more specific（初级的或许低级的都是一种阅历）

已婚未婚：Still looking for a rich and beautiful girl□hopefully can find in your company（我正在寻觅美丽又富有的女孩，希望在你们公司能找到

将来希冀：Have a speech on stage and retire as soon as possible（只担任主席台讲话，并且希望尽迟到休）

希望待遇：Lesser workload the better（比实践任务量拿得多就行

A mother mouse was out for a stroll with her babies when she spotted a cat crouched behind a bush. She watched the cat, and the cat watched the mice.

Mother mouse barked fiercely, "Woof, woof, woof!" The cat was so terrified that it ran for it's life.

Mother mouse turned to her babies and said, "Now, do you understand the value of a second language?"

老鼠的第二言语也重要

一只母老鼠带着孩子出来漫步，忽然她看见一只猫正在灌木丛中虎视耽耽。

母老鼠向着猫叫道："汪，汪，汪"，猫听了十分惧怕，拼命跑走了。

母老鼠回过头洋洋自得的对孩子说："如今你晓得外语的重要性了吧。"

Tommy: How is your little brother, Johnny? Johnny: He is ill in bed. He hurt himself. Tommy: That's too bad. How did that happen?

Johnny: We played who could lean furthest out of the window,and he won.

他赢了

汤姆：约翰尼，你小弟弟好吗？ 约翰尼：他害病卧床了。他受了伤。 汤姆：真蹩脚，怎样回事儿？约翰尼：我们做游戏，看谁能把身子探出窗外最远，他赢了。

There was a barber in a developing country who had a little shed at the roadside to cut hair, and a certain man used to come in regularly for haircuts. One day he noticed that a dog was always sitting underneath, near the chair where the customers sat for their haircuts. So the man asked the barber, "Is that your dog?" And the barber replied, "No, he always comes every day. It's not my dog. I don't know whose dog it is." Then the customer asked, "So if it's not your dog, you never feed him, right?" And the barber said, "No." And the customer said, "Then why does he always come here every day?" And the barber answered, "He's waiting in case an ear comes off." A Very Patient Pooch

一处粗陋的乡下，一位理发徒弟在路边的小棚子帮人理发。有位常常 来理发的男士，留意到有一只狗老是喜欢坐在主人的座椅旁边，于是 他问徒弟：那是你的狗吗？徒弟答：不，不是我的狗，我不知 道那是谁的狗，不过，它每天都会来。那个主人又问：不是你的狗，那你历来没有喂过它吗？徒弟答复：没有。主人又问:那它为什么每天都来？徒弟答复：它在等看看有没有耳朵掉上去。 耐烦的狗

Last week, Mrs Black went to London. She didn’t know London very well, and she lost her way. Suddenly she saw a man near a bus stop. She went up to the man and said, “Excuse me! Can you tell me the way to the hospital, please?” The man smiled. He didn’t know English! He came from Germany. But then he put his hand into his pocket, and took out an English dictionary. He looked up some words. Then he said slowly, “I’m sorry I can’t understand you.”

上周，布莱克夫人去了一趟伦敦。她不太熟习伦敦，后果她迷路了。忽然她在一个公共汽车站左近看见一位女子。她急忙向这位女子走去，说道：“劳驾您一下！请您通知我去医院的路，好吗？”这位女子笑了。他听不懂英语。他来自德国。但是他将手伸进了本人的衣袋里，从外面掏出了一本英语词典。他查找到了一些单词。然后他一字一句地说：“我很抱歉我听不懂你说的话。”